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Showing posts with label saving marriages. Show all posts
Showing posts with label saving marriages. Show all posts

Friday, April 22, 2011

Having Relationship Problems? Understanding Your Troubled Relationship-Can Save It

Having Relationship Problems? Understanding Your Troubled Relationship-Can Save It

Hey guys,

You are in a relationship and you are finding things quite confusing. You could be feeling like the relationship has run its course, or that you are not being honest with yourself. You are merely pretending to be happy, or maybe you are afraid over what the next step will be. Don't worry, you are not alone in feeling all this. We all go through it one way or another.

These signs of a troubled relationship can plague the person and put strain on a possibly damaged relationship. One of the more common feelings is guilt over lying and hiding ones true feelings over the relationship and its status. The fact of the matter is, you need to confront the truth head on and try to find a solution for the problem relationship - together.

There was a great deal of love in the relationship, but now there are a lot of mixed feelings and factors that are contributing to the mixed feelings that one is feeling. When you have begun to consider your troubled relationship, it is important to brainstorm what sort of things that you want and what you do not want in your relationship right now.

The latter can include not wanting to be cheated on, abused, and ignored and so on. When it comes to items that you want to have happen, these can include wanting to grow and develop emotionally. One can want for excitement and romance in the relationship. Sometimes one wants intellectual and spiritual stimulation, including discussions and attending outside meetings and events.

Once you have a list of your wants and desires, you need to go through them and identify those which you truly want and do not want. You need to figure out what sort of situation you are in and whether or not it will continue on its track. Observe your partner and try and figure out if they are capable of growth and doing their part to help turn your troubled relationship around.

They need to be able to contribute to the repair of the relationship and move it forward. If things are truly bad, then you need to step back and see things with a clear head. This may simply involve separating temporarily, so that you and your partner can take the time alone to evaluate the situation without distraction. Sometime, what a relationship just need is a 'time-out' for the both of you.

Without having to live together and deal with all of the stresses of being together, both of you will have a clearer head which will provide the basis for a true evaluation of the situation. What you may find is that the relationship is such that you two cannot be together and that you need to end the relationship. It might be a drastic decision that you need to make.

Some relationships are not meant to be, and that should not discourage you. There will be someone for you. If you do find that you and your significant other are capable of making things work in your troubled relationship, then make sure that you and your partner are open and communicative. Without communication, it will be more difficult.

A troubled relationship does not necessarily mean that the end is near. What it does mean is that you and your partner need to take the steps to work things out and move the relationship forward, whether that is towards its end or continuation. The important thing is that the both of you work it out in a calm and mature situation instead of quarrellings and shouting at each in the middle of the night.

If you are having relationship problems and are at a lost on what to do then I recommend that you download and read through Magic Of Making Up. The book is authored by T.W. Jackson and he has helped couples in 77+ countries resolved their relationship problems.


To your relationship success.

P.S. Having relationship problems? Need help in re-igniting the fire in your relationship? Then look no further. Download and read through Magic of Making Up. Click here to download Magic Of Making Up!

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Saving Marriages With Unconditional Love

Saving Marriages With Unconditional Love



In the middle of a session the other day I had a powerful realization. I was asked to think of a relationship I had with something in the last week that in my mind was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal.

A number of men in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain.

When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple needs, and it is the ultimate ego-boost for me when I get home at night and I am greeted in such an enthusiastic fashion. I don’t know of any others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or no matter how my day has been. I call this unconditional love.

So what is unconditional love?

Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions.

It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to "real" love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect. You know your partner has faults. You know your partner is not perfect. You know your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. You still love them. This is unconditional love.

The same thing applies to you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.

So what do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our issues rule our lives.

But if you are serious about saving your marriage you need to put the clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to have faults and make mistakes. And love will conquer them all.

Have a think about unconditional love and how you can apply this realization to your relationship.

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